The 25% Rule states that everybody that comes into your life basically falls into 1 of 4 categories:
1st 25% consist of people who may like you at first but then may change their mind:
This is not necessarily a bad thing. Think of a time when you met someone and immediately hit it off. Maybe you grew up in the same town or graduated from the same school. But after talking with them for a while you found out that you have different beliefs or ways of dealing with certain things. The more you converse with this individual the more you realize that you really don’t have a lot in common. This doesn’t mean that you are a bad person or that they are better than you. It simply means that you are different and that’s ok. There is a good book with an even better title called “I’m not crazy I’m just not you.” You see, I’ve learned over the years that I don’t have to agree with everyone or have the same beliefs as my friends. I am my own...
The Bigger The Problem The Bigger The Gift:
I’ve heard it said before that God wraps every gift with a problem. The bigger the problem, the bigger the gift. What are you going through today? Don’t you know that a set back could just be an opportunity for a bigger and better comeback. There is one thing certain about life- at some point we will experience a problem. Ok so maybe more than one problem. But I believe that the goal in life shouldn't be to avoid these problems. The goal should be to learn how to cope with them. Looking back at my life I've been through so many ups and downs. And any time I experienced a problem I thought that I was doing something wrong. In fact, I was trying to figure out a way to not have problems. Long story short I ended up feeling like a failure because I was constantly experiencing something that was absolutely normal.
Now of course if you find yourself experiencing the same problem over and over well that might raise a red flag....
Keep A Positive Reminder File:
Do you find that it is difficult to focus on the positive things in life?
I've heard it said before that for every negative thing that is said to you about you it takes about 11 more positive statements after that just to cancel out that one negative statement. I mean think about that. Have you ever done something (perhaps a job, task, speech) and immediately after you focused only on the negative parts. You could have “hit it out the park” so to speak, but still you overlooked it as if it wasn’t a big deal. I believe that our human minds are conditioned to focus on the negative. And it’s because of this that we have negative feelings, we worry and usually fear the future.
Working as a counselor and helping people who struggle with addiction and self esteem issues I’ve discovered something very fascinating. When asked to tell me something positive about themselves and something that they can work on clients usually have...
The Power of Smiling:
I have a question for you: How many times a day do you smile (5, 10, maybe 20)? Did you know that it's been said that children can actually smile up 400x per day. Smiling is contagious. It can lower stress-enhancing hormones and increase mood-enhancing hormones.
Let's talk about that for a second:
Over the past few months I’ve been sharing these quick videos with the community and suggesting that we must change the way we think in order to be fully successful. But, it doesn't just stop with our thoughts. Physically, we must make adjustments.
One day while working I noticed that my body (physically) resembled that of a person who was tired, depressed and burned out. My head was down, my shoulders were slouched, and I had a frown on my face. Looking back I really don't think I was depressed. But my body was just so used of this that that seemed to be my default posture. Once I noticed this I began to be more aware of how I presented myself (walking...
Hilltop Moments- What Makes You Stronger!
Today I’m going to show you how going through your troubles can actually prepare you for some of your greatest achievements.
A while back I had the pleasure of watching my favorite NFL football team go to and win the super bowl. I'll never forget the interview that one of the reporters asked Drew Brees (The quarterback for the New Orleans saints) what it was like to win the game that would take them to the super bowl. In short he said its great! Tonight we will celebrate but tomorrow we have to focus on the super bowl. Low and behold the saints went to Miami that year and beat the colts for a super bowl victory. The reporter basically asked him the same question and he responded with pretty much the same answer. It's a great feeling- a great win. Tonight we will celebrate but tomorrow we focus on next season.
The super bowl win for pretty much everyone in Louisiana was what I like to call a hilltop moment. Hill top moments are...
The One Thing To Make Your Life Better
If I had to pick one thing, one element, one tool or skill to use to improve my way of life it would be Taking Responsibility For My Life!
It turns out that people who don't do this (take responsibility for themselves) usually blame others for their circumstances. And although there may be legitimate reason for blaming it doesn't really fix the problem. In fact if anything blaming just takes you out of the driver's seat and it gives control to the one you're blaming. You see when you take responsibility for your life you are in control. You are basically saying regardless of what happened to me or what is going on in the world (maybe it's fair/not fair, just/unjust, right /wrong) I’m not going to let other people’s drama get the best of me.
I remember when I first took responsibility for my life. I was 25 years old and had to make a decision. I was either going to blame my family, friends, the environment, government for my...
An Attitude of Gratitude (A Way Of Thinking)
If there is one thing that gets me back on track when I seem to be off, it's having an attitude of gratitude. You know I’ve learned that we really have a lot to be grateful for. Now I don't know what you are going through right now but I’m sure that whatever it is you can not only overcome it but also grow from it. Now that sounds easy to say but I wouldn't say that is always easy to hear (especially when you're going through a rough season)
Well it turns out that our attitude (especially in times of distress) is vital for our personal and professional success. People who have a negative attitude about their life usually stay stuck and people who have a positive attitude about life tend to have the fuel that they need to overcome the barriers that are keeping them from being their best.
There was a study done that showed how optimist and pessimist viewed the negative events in their life. It turns out that optimist tend to...
Find out what commuting to work and getting a college degree have in common.
I spend a lot of time in my car traveling for my job. In fact, when I tell people how much time I spend in my car I usually get a look as if I’ve lost my mind. Well, I’ve discovered that the time away and particularly in my car is not a waste of time. In fact, you can get more done in your vehicle to and from work than you probably realize.
You see, I found out that one of the reasons why people have the perception that I’m wasting time is because of what they are doing when they are commuting. It turns out that most people who travel either do one of three things (listen to the radio, think about stuff or yell and curse at the other people on the road). Ok so maybe they do all those at one time. I remember getting in my car and before I made a block i was either worrying about something or wasting my time getting frustrated with traffic.
I have found a...
Thank You Letter
People may go to their grave never knowing what a difference they made in your life. If someone had an impact on your life let them know today.
A few years ago a study was done that looked at business professionals and the top things they needed to be successful. To my surprise after reading the article I learnt that the #1 thing they needed was not money, promotions or even raises. Although those items definitely made the list, it turned out that the #1 commodity that most people needed was appreciation. Appreciation is simply the recognition and enjoyment of the good qualities of someone or something.
Think about that for a second. Has anyone in your life ever did something for you that made a difference. Maybe it was a mentor that took you under her wing in your first career or perhaps a family member that stuck by you through the hard times. You know I really believe that we take things for granted sometimes. I don’t think we mean to. We just kind...
This Mental Exercise Will Change The Way You Look At Things.
Change the way you look at things, and the things you look at changes- Wayne Dyer
One of the most fascinating things that I have ever studied was the brain. Although, this topic is sophisticated and often times can go over my head I’ve learned to respect it and take it for what it is. You see the human brain is what separates us from the rest of the animal kingdom. We have the ability to do something that no other creature can do- and that is THINK! You see humans actually have 3 brains (sort of ) instead of just one. There is our old brain (the part of us that gives us the ability to fight or flight). We have an emotional brain (the part that gives us the ability to feel). And we have the thinking brain (the part where our mental faculties live). This means we can think of what we want to think of. We can daydream, reason with others and set goals for our future. Or we can worry, hold resentments or think of...